When Gods Date

“I think my tie is not visible under the trunk” Ganesh paced around the room “What is the use of wearing a tie then?”

“Though not visible it is still classy. Relax, bro, you look great” Skanda took his spear in hand and jabbed a few thrusts in the air, as if killing an invisible enemy.

“Relax! Relax? Am not you, brother. I can’t make women fall for me easily. I wish I was fit enough to ride a peacock” Ganesh pulled at his belly flab which the black Armani suit did little to cover.

Skanda smiled his usual disarming smile “Look! Just be yourself. Simple as that!” he moved fluidically from one stance to another.

“Be myself? That’s all you got for me? Am so nervous that I can break a tusk!”
“Now what has the doctor told you about tusk talks?” Skanda put a hand around his brother.

“That it should be the farthest thing off my mind” the elephant headed boy looked down gloomily.

“You know about my wife Deva, she is the perfect match maker. Everything is going to work out, your brahmacari days are over”

Ganesh wished he could believe that. He hated being the third wheel in his brother’s dates, he hated being alone. He checked his reflection in the mirror before heading out of the door, of all the things he hated; he hated the way he looked. He parked his car outside the diner, he was profoundly sweating. “Get it together, man. You have been in battles far worse. How bad could this be?” he assured himself and walked in.

It dint take him long to find her. She was so radiant and sparkling that she stood out distinctively. He almost had second thoughts of leaving but he steeled his nerves, braved his fear and took the seat opposite to her. He offered her his sweaty hand “I guess you are waiting for me” in an all-so-shaky voice.

She took his hands, looked him straight in the eyes “Potnia Theron, friends call me Artemis!”

Ganesh was waiting for her eyes to move to his tusk and trunk and for her expression to change but it never did “You don’t look like you are from around here?” he asked after a long pause.

“No, am from Greece” she said with an infectious smile “I came here on business. Say, what’s the matter with the rat army swarming around your feet?”

Before he could answer the waitress came marching on her heels “There you go dear, mango milk shake as always” she placed the glass on the table “I see you managed to befriend all our rodents again” she scurried along as one of the rats tried to embark her toe.

“I am sorry, rats have an affinity towards me!” Ganesh looked apologetically trying to shoo them off in all but vain.

“I think that’s adorable” Potnia motioned her fingers and the rats hypnotically followed her finger motions as Ganesh stared in disbelief.

“So Ganesh, what do you do?” she asked waving the rodents out of the diner with a flick of a hand.

“Umm. My brother and I we are explorers” He slurped through the straw while fanning his big ears. His date so far was going unbelievably well making him wonder if it all was a dream.

“That’s nice! Where all have you been?” She placed her chin on her palm and leaned attentively.

“All around the world, we race around recording stuff for our parent’s TV show” Ganesh said, as if it was such an easy task. “What do you do, Potnia?”

She reached her hand out and stroked his trunk. “Am a zoo keeper!” she said in a mesmeric tone. Her touch ran bolts through his body and his nerve endings exploded with millions of firework.

A few hours later they walked out of the diner to his car, hand in hand.
“What is this, a Ferrari?” she asked, running a finger through the hood.
“No, it’s a Rath, my father’s company” He held open the door for her.
“Talk about family in high places” she giggled.
Ganesh looked up at the sky “You have no idea!” he said to himself.

 

I know the title gives away the ending, couldn’t be helped. For people who don’t get it, I have borrowed small tidbits about the Gods from Indian Mythology, I have tried to explain it below.
I mean no offense to the gods by this work.

Ganesh, also known as Ganapathy and Pillaiyar is a Hindu Deity with an elephant head. 
Skanda, also known as Murugan and Kartikeya is also a Hindu Deity.
Deva, wife of Skanda. Full name Devasena.
Potnia Theron, also known as Artemis is the Greek goddess of animals.